Recently I have been struggling with the idea of Christian perfection. The idea that if you are Godly enough you will not really sin. And the idea that if you really are a good Christian and a good Christian leader then perfection comes easy.
I am definitely not perfect in any way. God shows me that ever single day. If I ever think I am humbly reaching that state of perfection he makes sure all doubt is removed. Usually the removal process has something to do with choice words and/or restraint over a particular finger in direct reference to the car in in front of me that seems to have some confusion over which petal is for the gas. Or sometimes events that are a lot more drastic. I will be going along thinking that I am doing pretty well in my walk with God. I think I have things generally figured out and I am not all together bad. Then God lets me know that I am still human and I still sin. I am still capable of simultaneously really loving God and really screwing up. The problem is that when that occurs I don’t enter into a place where God can help me grow but rather I feel I must pull myself up, clean myself off, and then re-approach God.
Why do I feel like I must be perfect before God and man. Is it pride? Is it perfectionism with a little bit of OCD? Do other people feel like that or are they ok with just being a faulty, sinful human. What is it?
I think part of my issue is that somewhere early in my walk towards God there was a verse in scripture that was branded into my soul. Matthew 5:48: “Be perfect, as your heavenly father is perfect.” Seems like a nice sentiment, perfection is good, God is good, being perfect and Godly and all that is great, right?
That verse totally screwed me up. In the past 11 years of my life as a believer the idea that we must be something good, we much be clean and shiny and perfect to please God has become one of my main unconscious beliefs. It is not something that I have read in a doctrinal statement or picked up in a bible study but rather it is a concept that has grown within me as I have grown in leadership within the church. Maybe I shouldn’t say the verse itself messed me up because it probably isn’t the scripture itself. It is the interpretation I learned of that verse that really screwed me up. It was the church trying to superimpose that verse over faulty, messed up, people that really screwed me up.
God says, “come as you are” but the church says “appearances matter.” God says, “while you were still a sinner, when you didn’t know me or love me, I loved you.” The church says that your actions must be Godly or your probably not really “saved.” I suppose in some ways I have stepped up this role by taking a few steps up the pedestal of leadership in a my church. But I have yet to determine when, on that staircase, human nature ceases and divine perfection of the sinless leader who has “it” all together begins.
Apparently I missed that step.
So, in trying to get a grasp on perfection as stated in scripture I wanted to take a look at what this verse really says. Being the nerd that I am I looked it up in the Greek and spend a lovely evening doing a word study. I will spare you the details but this is my translation of the verse. (If you have any doubt about my translation abilities keep in mind that I am well qualified after an entire 13 weeks of Greek.) This is what I came up with:
“Therefore, you will be complete (mature) as your father in heaven is complete (mature).”
The word “teleios” that is translated as “perfect” is actually more like mature or “having reached it’s end.” In other verses like 1 Cor. 14:20 or Phil 3:15 it is translated as “mature.” Also, there is one more crucial difference. Telios is first in the future middle tense and the second time around (in reference to God) in the present active indicative tense. We are going to be while God is.
The verse never says “Be perfect now.” That makes me feel a little better.
I should make the disclaimer that I am not pushing the idea of what Bonheoffer calls “cheap grace.” Basically, do whatever you want because God has mercy and grace for it. I think we should seek after God the best we can. We should attempt to love him with all of our heart, mind, soul, and strength. But I think what we are doing is merely an attempt. To say that by our attempts we can be perfect seems somewhat absurd when you think about it, look at the world around us, and look inside yourself.
Becoming, not being, perfect is possible and what we are called to do. It is all a process. It is all a walk towards God.
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